The Reason

This blog was started as a way for me to record our, my daughter Luisa and our family's, journey with Amniotic Band Syndrome that presented itself on the head of our sweet daughter. And has turned into a journey of dealing with a fatal prognosis, and the very premature death of our sweet baby. My great hope is that we might be able to help at least someone, if not more, by sharing this experience.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Coming upon the end of a year

I am a horrible blogger. I didn't start this blog though with the intent to blog. I started it with the intent to record a very important event in my life. For me, this blog has really been more of a journal.
At the end of this month it will be one year since that fateful day where we went to the gender ultrasound that changed us forever. I cannot believe that almost a year has passed. I am glad that its finally here though. I am glad that time, in true fashion, has marched on, whether I was ready for it to march or not. Its almost satisfying to look back on what has passed, and how I've gotten through it, knowing that I really am a better person for it. Not a perfect person, by any means, but definitely better. I am a bit anxious though to see how the next couple of months will be as we come upon these meaningful and emotional anniversaries. Wow, like I said, I can't believe its here. It just seems like, for awhile, I was quite literally just barely putting one foot in front of the other, and then gradually I would add to that. And now, here we are.
It has been said that we need to prepare for the future ( as much as possible), remember and learn from the past, but we need to live in the present. That is something that I have really been trying to do these past couple of months. And maybe thats why I have been absent from this blog.
But, there is news in our lives here. I. Am. Pregnant. Yes, its true. I'm in my 15th week or there about. I was actually pregnant with Luisa at this time last year. I almost feel like I get a do over. My due date is May 19, just 3 weeks after Luisa's due date. I am so happy and grateful. It has been a hard pregnancy though. The hardest one so far. I'm sure the emotional anxiety is not helping. But, so far so good. Thank you for reading. More to come as the anniversaries arrive.

4 comments:

  1. Congrats! That is exciting news. I have reached my year mark and it was hard, but I'm grateful now because I feel like a new person...not sad all the time. Thanks for sharing. I am so glad for you!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I just ran across your blog. I am sorry you too lost your daughter. I also lost mine to ABS. Our diagnosis wasn't fatal - but she suffered greatly. We made the tough decision to allow her to go to heaven and end her suffering. If you ever need someone to talk to - I get much of what you are going through. You can reach me via my blog at: http://roxyttandme.blogspot.com/

    (((hugs)))
    Elizabeth

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am so sorry for your loss. I too lost my daughter to ABS. Her diagnosis wasn't fatal -but she was suffering greatly. We were given the choice to end her suffering - and we did. I understand much of what you are going through. If you ever need someone to talk to - I am here. You can reach me via: http://roxyttandme.blogspot.com/

    (((hugs)))
    Elizabeth

    ReplyDelete
  4. Kathleen, I am so happy and excited for you and your whole family!! I love reading your blogs. Your are a fantastic writer and an incredible example to me and all those around you. I hope you all have a fantastic holiday season. We are always thinking about you guys. Hope to see you soon!
    Love Hil and the boys!! :)

    ReplyDelete